So, I don't really write here much because there isn't really anything to update on. There have been no new concerts because it's the school year and things are busy as hell, and literally every Sick Puppies emotion Jenn and I have ever had is completely gone. We don't even dream about them, which means they aren't even existing in our subconscious.
I literally haven't even heard, said, or thought the words "Sick Puppies" in months. Until tonight. Jennifer called me and said she had huge news to tell me. I was like oooook...... then she continues to tell me that news just broke that Shim left Sick Puppies. I don't even know if there is a name for the emotion I felt. Like, I was in shock and disbelief. But also giddy, flustered, elated.......it was just a feeling I can't pin down. My heart was like beating so fast and I couldn't talk. If this would have happened 2 years ago I would have broken down on the floor into a ball and wept myself into an uncontrollable tizzy. But tonight, its like, I knew this was coming and I got out before the storm. I am not surprised, but I have to say, If I thought anyone was going to leave the band I thought it would have been Emma or Mark because they were pissed off at Shim. I pegged Shim to be too "tough guy" to quit. This just makes me laugh.
I know its crazy, but I know deep deep down in a depth unknown to anyone that Jenn and I were a small part of the straw that broke the camel's back. Not to say that we stopped being their fans and they were like, "Oh God we can't be a band now!" but just that Shim obviously knew why we left (cuz we made it clear) and he had to have had some sort of an honest moment at some point and been unhappy with the direction of his (or their) musical career. I mean, lets be honest, Connect didn't exactly top the charts. Or even make the charts for that matter. But besides the fact, somewhere along the way, Jenn and I were a minuscule part of this whole thing going down. I'm not even embarrassed or sorry about giving ourselves credit. I know the whole thing affected him. It was written all over his face. And he wouldn't have been so pissed off if it didn't bother him. So to say I'm anything but overjoyed is an understatement. I am so excited to creep forums and see what idiots are about to commit suicide over this shebackle.
I can say that this chapter is officially fucking closed!
Monday, October 20, 2014
Monday, July 28, 2014
Mosquitoes and Memories
My legs look diseased today as the scabs are showing up from the massive amount of mosquito bites I got while waiting for Chevelle after the show in Mississippi. One of the locals waiting with us told us that the mosquito is the state bird of Mississippi. haha I seriously itched so bad for 2 days. I almost couldn't stand it. I was just ripping off my skin. Now, they are just red scabs scattered around my thighs and ankles. People around here probably think I'm a meth addict. But whatever, it was worth it.
Today I was thinking about this blog and up until this point it has only been used as a means to talk about concerts we have gone to in the past year. But, I want to utilize this more to talk about live music and the feelings it brings to me and J.
I got to thinking about what got me obsessed with going to concerts and I can trace it back to the late 90's when I fell in love with No Doubt. I don't just mean that I loved their songs on the radio I mean I was full out IN LOVE overly obsessed. My room was filled with posters on all four walls and the ceilings, for a few years in school I would only wear No Doubt T-shirts, I had every piece of memorabilia sold in their store, and I had VHS tapes of every TV performance they ever made. It was absolute ridiculousness. I remember bawling one time when they won MTV artist of the year. I couldn't even contain myself. In 1997 my dad took me to see the Tragic Kingdom tour in St. Louis. I remember wearing my "No Doubt Any Time" shirt with my knee length jean shorts. I have never been so happy in my life. I remember exactly where we sat in the Riverport Amphitheater and I remember the exact moment that Gwen came out on stage in her studded crop top and fur coat. The anticipation that built up to that moment is unlike any other I've ever felt. That was the exact minute that I fell in love with concerts. To this day the best way I can describe my personality is "I live for the 30 seconds before a band comes onto the stage."
In the early 2000's I went on my first "tour". Because I have the coolest parents ever, I was able to go with my dad to No Doubt concerts in Kansas City and St. Louis. At the Kansas City show I experienced my first mosh pit. Thinking back to that now I cannot believe that I was in a mosh pit with my dad. It's almost laughable. I have a picture of myself in the mosh pit complete with flipped out hair, acne, and braces. But damn.....I looked so happy. It was a pure euphoric moment. I was within mere feet of my idols. I had water sprayed on me by the keyboard player, I touched the guitarists' hand, and I could see the sweat on freaking Gwen Stefani's face. It was the best day ever.
Throughout the 2000's I stayed obsessed with No Doubt. I traveled with my dad to numerous shows. We went to Las Vegas, Minneapolis, Illinois, and all over Missouri. These were my early days of touring. I guess I can blame my dad for my touring addiction! I ended up meeting No Doubt twice. I bawled and almost fainted the first time. The second time I was able to get my shit together a little bit but I'm pretty sure I still wasn't able to mutter a word. Those were the most amazing days.
Eventually my obsession died down and I packed up all of my memorabilia. But my love for concerts and touring stayed strong. I found different bands and expanded my traveling boundaries. Sometimes I wish I could go back to that stress free, naive bliss that filled those days following No Doubt with my dad. But I have learned so much and met so many great people and bands that even though I can't get rid of the stress and expectations, I wouldn't trade it for the world.
That is my story. Even if no one except J reads this, it feels good to put it out there. However, if anyone reads this who can relate or has a story of their own, I would love to hear it. It's nice to know you aren't the only crazy one! haha
A
Today I was thinking about this blog and up until this point it has only been used as a means to talk about concerts we have gone to in the past year. But, I want to utilize this more to talk about live music and the feelings it brings to me and J.
I got to thinking about what got me obsessed with going to concerts and I can trace it back to the late 90's when I fell in love with No Doubt. I don't just mean that I loved their songs on the radio I mean I was full out IN LOVE overly obsessed. My room was filled with posters on all four walls and the ceilings, for a few years in school I would only wear No Doubt T-shirts, I had every piece of memorabilia sold in their store, and I had VHS tapes of every TV performance they ever made. It was absolute ridiculousness. I remember bawling one time when they won MTV artist of the year. I couldn't even contain myself. In 1997 my dad took me to see the Tragic Kingdom tour in St. Louis. I remember wearing my "No Doubt Any Time" shirt with my knee length jean shorts. I have never been so happy in my life. I remember exactly where we sat in the Riverport Amphitheater and I remember the exact moment that Gwen came out on stage in her studded crop top and fur coat. The anticipation that built up to that moment is unlike any other I've ever felt. That was the exact minute that I fell in love with concerts. To this day the best way I can describe my personality is "I live for the 30 seconds before a band comes onto the stage."
In the early 2000's I went on my first "tour". Because I have the coolest parents ever, I was able to go with my dad to No Doubt concerts in Kansas City and St. Louis. At the Kansas City show I experienced my first mosh pit. Thinking back to that now I cannot believe that I was in a mosh pit with my dad. It's almost laughable. I have a picture of myself in the mosh pit complete with flipped out hair, acne, and braces. But damn.....I looked so happy. It was a pure euphoric moment. I was within mere feet of my idols. I had water sprayed on me by the keyboard player, I touched the guitarists' hand, and I could see the sweat on freaking Gwen Stefani's face. It was the best day ever.
Throughout the 2000's I stayed obsessed with No Doubt. I traveled with my dad to numerous shows. We went to Las Vegas, Minneapolis, Illinois, and all over Missouri. These were my early days of touring. I guess I can blame my dad for my touring addiction! I ended up meeting No Doubt twice. I bawled and almost fainted the first time. The second time I was able to get my shit together a little bit but I'm pretty sure I still wasn't able to mutter a word. Those were the most amazing days.
Eventually my obsession died down and I packed up all of my memorabilia. But my love for concerts and touring stayed strong. I found different bands and expanded my traveling boundaries. Sometimes I wish I could go back to that stress free, naive bliss that filled those days following No Doubt with my dad. But I have learned so much and met so many great people and bands that even though I can't get rid of the stress and expectations, I wouldn't trade it for the world.
That is my story. Even if no one except J reads this, it feels good to put it out there. However, if anyone reads this who can relate or has a story of their own, I would love to hear it. It's nice to know you aren't the only crazy one! haha
A
Friday, July 25, 2014
Back on the Road
It feels so good to be able to tour blog again! Even though life has kind of gotten in the way and we haven't been to even half the concerts we used to in the summer, Jenn and I still found a few days to squeeze in 2 Chevelle shows outside of Missouri! :)
On this tour we found out so many things about ourselves and our lifestyles. We learned that it is possible (and okay!!!) to go to a concert without any expectations and still enjoy yourself. We learned that we can be nice and patient, and we can go to Oklahoma without death or serious injury!!
The trip started Tuesday with a show in Tulsa, Oklahoma. Due to a bad experience many years ago in Oklahoma (along with the ridiculous amount of toll roads and construction), we have very strategically avoided Oklahoma for years. But as part of our fresh start (and honestly, desperation for a possible show) we headed out for Tulsa. We didn't leave until day of show and didn't arrive at the venue until 3:30pm. For anyone who knows us, this is about 6-7 hours later than we usually arrive for a show! The most interesting thing is that we didn't even get into line at that point. We met a really good concert friend (and road mother) across the street for an amazing Mexican dinner. It was so great to catch up after 4 years and talk candidly about everything. It made being in Oklahoma better ;)
We got in line about an hour before doors. We weren't even close to being first and we didn't have heart attacks or die or anything. It was amazing. We ended up on the rail but not center. We managed to scoot right in front of Dean which was perfectly fine with us. The opening band, Highly Suspect, was amazing. We have fallen in love with their sound. I would highly recommend checking them out!!
Chevelle was just unbelievable as usual! I smiled through the whole show! I rocked out, I cried, I laughed, I experienced everything that music is supposed to make you experience. I didn't calculate my movements, or anticipate glances, or pick and choose songs to "feel". I was just there. I was just happy. After the show we met Dean but the other guys didn't come out. I was absolutely ok with this.
We met up with our awesome Tulsa friends at IHOP again before leaving Oklahoma. We had such a great time. We talked until 3am! It was almost like a therapy session. We pretty much told them everything and didn't even care. It's the first time we've talked to someone else about the whole Sick Puppies thing. So that was an accomplishment for us. It helped us reach full closure. But real closure this time! We've been talking about the whole ordeal for a year now and convincing ourselves that we were over it. But it took this trip to actually move on and have a feeling of peace with everything. We sadly said goodbye to our friends and headed towards Memphis. We made it pretty far! We didn't stop until 5:30am. We slept in the car as usual and made it to Memphis the next afternoon.
It was so nice to have a really comfortable bed. We both crashed and didn't wake up until after dinner. We showered and went downtown. We were a little apprehensive about spending time in Memphis because everyone told us it was so dirty and dangerous. Completely the opposite! We had the best time in Memphis. We walked around all night. We had amazing food at a place called Huey's and we experienced Beale Street at it's best. We encountered the friendliest people you could ever imagine and were humbled by southern hospitality. It was a true life changing experience.
The next day we left Memphis and went to Tunica, Mississippi. On our way out of Memphis we were humbled yet again by the amazing people of the South. We tried fried corn and jojo's for the first time and we spent the trip relaxed and patient. Jennifer and I joked that we needed to move to Memphis for a year to rediscover our patience. Tunica was unbelievable. From the minute we walked in the casino doors every single person was friendly and courteous. Ellis, the front door security guard brought us magazines to make our wait a little less boring, and Sindy, the Bluesville "end all be all" took us under her wing and set us up for the night. We met Chevelle backstage before the show thanks to VIP passes from Sindy, and we got front row center about 15 minutes before doors opened. There was no opening band so our anticipation didn't last long. The show was amazing. They played a whole different setlist, including Closure and Envy, which seemed to hit at just the right time. I almost cried during each of these songs when I realized how much they spoke to me.
"I may not win the race
I may not reach the top
Or I may not live your way;
It doesn't mean I'm stuck here
We may not fit the mold
Kind of going off
Well, the medicine inside takes a stronger hold"
"Like a leach,
I hold on as if we belonged,
To some precious pure dream.
Cast off, you've seen what's beneath,
Now fail me."
"Closure has come to me myself,
You will never belong to me."
On this tour we found out so many things about ourselves and our lifestyles. We learned that it is possible (and okay!!!) to go to a concert without any expectations and still enjoy yourself. We learned that we can be nice and patient, and we can go to Oklahoma without death or serious injury!!
The trip started Tuesday with a show in Tulsa, Oklahoma. Due to a bad experience many years ago in Oklahoma (along with the ridiculous amount of toll roads and construction), we have very strategically avoided Oklahoma for years. But as part of our fresh start (and honestly, desperation for a possible show) we headed out for Tulsa. We didn't leave until day of show and didn't arrive at the venue until 3:30pm. For anyone who knows us, this is about 6-7 hours later than we usually arrive for a show! The most interesting thing is that we didn't even get into line at that point. We met a really good concert friend (and road mother) across the street for an amazing Mexican dinner. It was so great to catch up after 4 years and talk candidly about everything. It made being in Oklahoma better ;)
We got in line about an hour before doors. We weren't even close to being first and we didn't have heart attacks or die or anything. It was amazing. We ended up on the rail but not center. We managed to scoot right in front of Dean which was perfectly fine with us. The opening band, Highly Suspect, was amazing. We have fallen in love with their sound. I would highly recommend checking them out!!
Chevelle was just unbelievable as usual! I smiled through the whole show! I rocked out, I cried, I laughed, I experienced everything that music is supposed to make you experience. I didn't calculate my movements, or anticipate glances, or pick and choose songs to "feel". I was just there. I was just happy. After the show we met Dean but the other guys didn't come out. I was absolutely ok with this.
We met up with our awesome Tulsa friends at IHOP again before leaving Oklahoma. We had such a great time. We talked until 3am! It was almost like a therapy session. We pretty much told them everything and didn't even care. It's the first time we've talked to someone else about the whole Sick Puppies thing. So that was an accomplishment for us. It helped us reach full closure. But real closure this time! We've been talking about the whole ordeal for a year now and convincing ourselves that we were over it. But it took this trip to actually move on and have a feeling of peace with everything. We sadly said goodbye to our friends and headed towards Memphis. We made it pretty far! We didn't stop until 5:30am. We slept in the car as usual and made it to Memphis the next afternoon.
It was so nice to have a really comfortable bed. We both crashed and didn't wake up until after dinner. We showered and went downtown. We were a little apprehensive about spending time in Memphis because everyone told us it was so dirty and dangerous. Completely the opposite! We had the best time in Memphis. We walked around all night. We had amazing food at a place called Huey's and we experienced Beale Street at it's best. We encountered the friendliest people you could ever imagine and were humbled by southern hospitality. It was a true life changing experience.
The next day we left Memphis and went to Tunica, Mississippi. On our way out of Memphis we were humbled yet again by the amazing people of the South. We tried fried corn and jojo's for the first time and we spent the trip relaxed and patient. Jennifer and I joked that we needed to move to Memphis for a year to rediscover our patience. Tunica was unbelievable. From the minute we walked in the casino doors every single person was friendly and courteous. Ellis, the front door security guard brought us magazines to make our wait a little less boring, and Sindy, the Bluesville "end all be all" took us under her wing and set us up for the night. We met Chevelle backstage before the show thanks to VIP passes from Sindy, and we got front row center about 15 minutes before doors opened. There was no opening band so our anticipation didn't last long. The show was amazing. They played a whole different setlist, including Closure and Envy, which seemed to hit at just the right time. I almost cried during each of these songs when I realized how much they spoke to me.
"I may not win the race
I may not reach the top
Or I may not live your way;
It doesn't mean I'm stuck here
We may not fit the mold
Kind of going off
Well, the medicine inside takes a stronger hold"
"Like a leach,
I hold on as if we belonged,
To some precious pure dream.
Cast off, you've seen what's beneath,
Now fail me."
"Closure has come to me myself,
You will never belong to me."
After the show we said goodbye to Sindy and Jackie. Something we would NEVER do normally. It felt great and we were rewarded with kindness. We waited by the bus until the guys came out. They were all very talkative and funny and we had such a great time. We even talked to their TM and told him a funny story about a past show. He was very intrigued. Before we left we told everyone goodbye and thank you. They were all so nice and sweet. This is something we have never done before. We almost have a rule that we don't talk to people, we don't smile, we don't engage or interact. We just get our shit done and leave. We never want to let on that we want more or know more. We just keep mysterious. Being able to break that mold felt so good!!
We were so happy the entire way home. There was nothing to dissect. Nothing to feel depressed about. Just pure joy. We found a band that means something to us. We were purely happy the entire show. We didn't expect to be recognized or treated specially. When we weren't it was ok! That wasn't why we were there. The show was amazing on it's own. That's all that matters. We were so happy we decided to embrace the southern way and told the woman at McDonald's to have a blessed day. She responded with a genuine "you too!!" If we were to do that here we would probably get a WTF look and a "Fuck you". It's safe to say we will probably be touring the south exclusively from now on! haha :)
It is also safe to say that SP will not be entering our thoughts again. We have talked about closure for a year. We were never really over it. This was the week we needed to feel what true release feels like. It was a great time while it lasted. We lost ourselves. We got addicted to the drug. We went to rehab. We relapsed. We almost got lost again. This time we put ourselves through a true "dialysis" to come out clean and pure and in the right state of mind. It feels good. And as ridiculous as it sounds to say that we just got out of a bad relationship with a band, I know there are people out there who will understand and sympathize. It took some time and some roadblocks, but we have found the love of our life and we plan to live happily ever after!
Thank you again to our road parents in Tulsa. You guys are awesome! See you soon
A
Monday, March 17, 2014
Getting Back In The Groove!
So, it seems like a lifetime since summer, and Lancaster, and this blog. School has started, Jenn has gone back to Nashville, and life has gotten busy. We have all moved on and it's nice. I admit, it took a long time to get shit together and sort through thoughts and ideas from our last concert journey. We have talked about Sick Puppies a lot and we have talked about what happened in Lancaster a lot, but not once in those months of talking have we ever said, "wow I wish that hadn't have happened." Are there things that could have gone differently? Sure. But in the end it's all good! I still get ill feelings over the World Crew and the people that ruined so many good things, but then I laugh to myself and think of all the times that we knew people and we knew shit that people thought we didn't know because they didn't know us. And then I listen to Chevelle and I'm happy :)
Speaking of Chevelle........their new single is AMAZING! I pre-ordered their new album and I bought tickets to their STL show, which I will be attending with Jennifer and Devon! It's amazing that a rock band can stay a rock band throughout the years and still be successful. Beyond that, they can continue to make new and exciting sounds while still maintaining what makes them them (and their dignity). It will be so nice to get back into the concert routine. This STL show will be a good little warm up to our summer tour with Chevelle. Hopefully we can throw some HURT and Ten Years into the mix too and just make it an awesome tour summer. We haven't had one of those in 4 years. It always seems to be hit and miss. I just want to get in a mosh pit and rock the fuck out.
Updates to come in the following weeks. Anticipation for 4-5 is killing me!
"It's bad enough I want the fear. I need the fear."
-Amanda
Speaking of Chevelle........their new single is AMAZING! I pre-ordered their new album and I bought tickets to their STL show, which I will be attending with Jennifer and Devon! It's amazing that a rock band can stay a rock band throughout the years and still be successful. Beyond that, they can continue to make new and exciting sounds while still maintaining what makes them them (and their dignity). It will be so nice to get back into the concert routine. This STL show will be a good little warm up to our summer tour with Chevelle. Hopefully we can throw some HURT and Ten Years into the mix too and just make it an awesome tour summer. We haven't had one of those in 4 years. It always seems to be hit and miss. I just want to get in a mosh pit and rock the fuck out.
Updates to come in the following weeks. Anticipation for 4-5 is killing me!
"It's bad enough I want the fear. I need the fear."
-Amanda
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