Recent Events and Closure

Hello! I am in a much better place today than I was the other day. I was feeling bad and upset about the events of Lancaster. However, some recent events have shown me (and Jenn) that this whole thing is so stupid! We are letting a stupid band run our thoughts 24 hours a day. It's over. We have both seen the light and we have both reached closure.

We started doing this whole thing because we were in love with the music. That developed a love for the band and a love for their concerts. However, over the years we grew to love their music less and less. But we kept going to the shows because they were fun. The most recent shows though, Since late 2010, haven't been fun. We haven't been going to them because we enjoyed them. It was more of a competition....  Just to see what we could make happen that night. We left more shows unhappy than happy. I honestly don't know why we did that to ourselves for as long as we did.

We go to Chevelle shows, and 10 years shows, and HURT shows, and Janus shows, and MCR shows for THE SHOW. I genuinely am so in love with every single part of their music and sound. Their words mean something to me. I'm not overwhelmed by meaningless messages. I got so sick of SP trying to give me a sad story message. It always had to be you're an outcast, things will get better, one day you won't be bullied......blah blah blah. I enjoy seeing bands when I connect with their music. I don't think I've ever left a Chevelle crying for any reason other than their words affected me in some way.

I'm just sad it took this long to have this realization. I shouldn't have ever made myself feel bad for something that I have felt for years. Next summer will be spent following those other bands I am actually in love with. Its going to be exciting and not a sick contest with no one other than myself.